Peak experiences like an amazing improv scene, mind opening meditation are exciting! But, in improv, productivity, and simply being present for our lives, concentrating only on occasional special experiences can get in the way. There’s a line in a Zen story that I’ve been coming back to recently “Ordinary mind is the way.”*
Ordinary Mind Is More of Our Time
If we are hoping to develop a quality in ourselves, peak experiences in meditation, improv, or yoga classes help us glimpse new horizons of what’s possible. But if we ignore the quality in our daily lives, these brief moments can be swamped by everything else we’re doing. It’s like eating a salad followed by ten doughnuts and hoping to be healthy.
For example
- Meditating for 15 minutes but then getting swept up in digital distractions or circular thinking for hours.
- Finding an exciting new moment of freedom in an improv class but then spending the next day criticizing yourself for all the things you “should have done.”
- Getting stronger in yoga, then being slumped sitting too long in an awkward position.
One “ordinary mind” example for me is handling digital distractions and re-learning how to do one thing at a time. Choose a task, start it, see it through to the end with breaks if necessary, finish, and then move on to the next thing.
It’s hard sometimes! I get restless, and my little dopamine monster wants to rush off to a new sparkly thing. But – like with meditation – after repeatedly coming back to it, it begins to feel good.
Around Work
There are lots of ways to approach this. I think the best ones are simple. For example, choose one thing to do next. Write it on a Post-it note to stay focused. Set a 25-minute timer, then resolve to settle into it, bringing yourself back as necessary when you get distracted. At the end of 25 minutes, reward yourself with a doodle or a movement break. I like to get up and do something physical like a small piece of housework. Then start on to the next 25-minute chunk. Honestly, it sometimes feels a bit boring without the dopamine hits, but afterwards, it feels good.
Around Creativity and Play
You might adjust your normal life to support creativity and fun. This isn’t about peak experiences. It is more about creating a fertile soil in which other seeds can grow. Try cooking with a new ingredient, walking a different route, or messaging a friend, explore what’s on your mind through journalling. Structured time like laughter or improv classes are the foreground while ordinary life is the supportive background. Each enhances the other.
Ordinary Mind is the Land of Discovery
Improv pioneer Keith Johnstone used to advise his students, “Don’t try so hard. Be average!”
Trying too hard pushes us into our heads and what should be, instead of the present moment and what is. In the same “Ordinary Mind” Koan, the teacher says, “If you try for it, you will become separated from it.” Like someone trying a bit too hard on a date, or trying too hard to get to sleep. Beyond a certain point, more effort leads to worse results.**
When we strive to be special or “better,” that attempt is based on what we already know. It gives us more of the same. Instead, letting go of expectations and giving ourselves permission to be ordinary, average, helps us to open up and discover something new.
Ordinary Mind Is More Consistent
When we’re not trying to be special, we don’t need gold stars every time. They become nice but not necessary. Getting off the emotional rollercoaster makes it easier to stay with it.
Special is intense; ordinary is consistent. Great scene? No big deal. Terrible scene? No big deal. Got distracted? No big deal. Missed an exercise session? No big deal.
As long as we don’t make a drama out of it, we get infinite chances to start again. No one is keeping score.
Most of what makes a difference in our lives isn’t our occasional big wins or failures, but what we do every day. Ordinary mind lowers the bar, allowing us to show up more consistently.
Firing Your Inner Drama Queen
When we shape our ordinary life to support us and we fire our inner drama queen, we do get more peak experiences. But not every time—they happen when they happen.
Enjoy the special moments as they come, but your leverage point might be the ordinary mind activities supporting them.
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* “Ordinary mind is the way” and “If you try for it, you will become separated from it” are both from The Gateless Gate Case 19
** This is a bit like the Taoist concept of Wu Wei or British writer Aldous Huxley’s Law of Reversed Effort: “The harder we try with the conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed. Proficiency and results come only to those who have learned the paradoxical art of doing and not doing, or combining relaxation with activity.”